So said director Mike Figgis when he landed in Los Angeles airport. This got him a five hour interrogation by Homeland Security.

I thought everyone in LA had a script for a movie or TV show sitting in their sock drawer, so how could the officers not know a pilot is a TV term. Besides, Figgis is white, without a generally non-white sounding name like Cat Stevens’ (Yousuf Islam), so I am surprised he got pulled aside at all.

 Update: Turns out the story is untrue (Boing Boing). Well, well, well. Now I almost wish the story was true, begging the pardon of Mr. Figgis.